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More than Sex: Tantra for Couples and Individuals.

Author: Mark Sutton

9th Oct 2015

Tantra, classically, was a hindu path to Moksha (liberation) which centred on the body and accepted everything and denied nothing. It believed that you could attain enlightenment not by renouncing life, but by fully experiencing life in all its aspects, including our sexuality and our sexual energy. Western modern day (Neo-)Tantra still uses our sexual energy for spiritual transformation but it has expanded into the spheres of Sexual and Relationship Healing and the experience of true intimacy to ourselves and our relationship. It is a testament to how we in the west view our sexuality that for many the word Tantra summons images of wild sex, self-indulgence and aging rock stars. There are celebrities other than Sting who practice Tantra: Scarlet Johannson, Heather Graham and Rita Wilson and Tom Hanks for example and the latter couple freely acknowledge that the practice of Tantra has contributed much to the success of their marriage.

Understanding that tantra and tantric ritual practices look at our connection to ourselves holistically: the relationship between our energetic, physical, emotional and spiritual aspects of our sexuality, is a key to understanding how it is a powerful motivator in our love relationships. It cultivates your sexual energies, your life force energies and creates a deep sense of presence, awareness and acceptance in your lovemaking. When you live in your body, experiencing yourself in the fullest sense, you move into a deeper understanding of your partner. It brings you both into connection with what is real in you and in your relationship, both in and out of the bedroom, it fundamentally changes how you relate and how you experience each other and it does so in a respectful, practical and grounded way.

Using these specific practices of breathing, seeing lovemaking as a meditation (where the journey is the destination) and rituals for connection and exploration create a balance that is sadly lacking in how we view sex, sexuality and lovemaking. It is beyond gender and stereotypes as it sees you as whole and complete in your humanity as a manifestation of the universe complete in yourself: In essence it is the activity of being and being through loving. This Creation or Re-creation of a healthy balance between yourself and your partner opens you to avenues of Communication, Intimacy and (yes of course) expanding Pleasure. As David Dieda says it has three approaches: Function (turning dysfunction into function therapeutically), Flow (experiencing energetic and sexual creative flow between you) and Glow (You are the light). It is not about bringing new sexual techniques into your sex life which may add spice but lack substance, but it is about bringing YOU into it and meeting your partner there. It is not about falling in love again, but about re-experiencing the love you have and giving you the means to rise in love.

Tantra Awakenings
Experiential Integrated Tantra

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